One of my buddies has been head over heels about his new girlfriend and talks about how awesome she is. He even claims that even after a moment of intimacy, she literally made him a sandwich. Hard to believe. So this lead to further questioning.
This is our conversation.
Razz: So you mean to tell me, she actually made you a sandwich...
Aaron: Yeah! I was like, "Baby, where are you going?" She said, "I thought you might be hungry so, I'm going to make you something to eat." And when I got downstairs, BAM! A sandwich!
Razz: You're so full of shit. There's no way after sex, a girl will just go make a sandwich.
Aaron: Ha, wells there's no way a girl YOU have sex with, will just go make a sandwich.
Razz: Yeah yeah. Whatever, So you finally had sex with her?
Aaron: No... I just said we were intimate.
Razz: Wow dude. Really? So What... She just wiped her mouth off and said, "Well baby, since I just ate, I'll fix you something?"
Aaron: AHA. Nah man. Shes just a really good girl.
Razz: Okay, I guess. So how come I've never seen her or met her before?
Aaron: Shes from So Cal. So I only see her from time to time.
Razz: What the heck? You go all the way to LA to see your "girlfriend" and you haven't had sex with her yet?
Aaron: Yeah. I'm trying to take it slow and do it right.
Razz: Do it right? What are you talking about? She makes you sandwiches after "intimacy" and you're doing something wrong?
Aaron: Nah man, I'm just taking it slow and showing respect. I'm waiting for the right time.
Razz: The right time.... YOU'RE WAITING FOR HER 18th BIRTHDAY AREN'T YOU!
Aaron: No man! She's 24.
Razz: And I stand up to put my pants on two legs at a time.
CBM
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